EXCLUSIVE: Sarah Silverman, Bill Hader and Other Celebs Coming to a Chipotle Near You

05/15/2014 at 12:01 AM ET

Chipotle Celebrity Packaging
Courtesy Chipotle

Using paper products and prose, Chipotle, the fast-casual burrito brand famous for their un-branded advertising, has come up with a new way to entertain customers.

Novelist Jonathan Safran Foer, author of Everything Is Illuminated and Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close, tapped 10 celebrity authors, comedians and thought-leaders — including comedian Sarah Silverman, director Judd Apatow and SNL star Bill Hader — to write short pieces that will be printed on paper cups and excerpted on takeout bags. The stories are paired with intricate, line-drawn graphics that echo themes in each story.

Chipotle Celebrity Packaging
Inset: JB Lacroix/Wireimage

PEOPLE got an exclusive preview of the celeb-themed cups in the “Cultivating Thought” collection, which will certainly provide a fun diversion if your lunch date’s conversation isn’t cutting it.

Silverman’s “Two-Minute Index” is written in her signature acerbic style and is basically a series of indictments and musings such as “People in cults don’t call their cults cults,” “I hate drama = I love drama” and “Vote ‘No’ on this spelling of Geoff.” (Click HERE to read Silverman’s entire story.)

Chipotle Celebrity Packaging
Inset: Jeff Vespa/Wireimage

Customers who remember the thrill of getting to fill up their own fast-food drink cups as kids (who ever stuck to just one kind?) will love Hader’s “Two-Minute Recipe for the Perfect Fountain Drink,” a remembrance of singing songs with his sisters as they mixed and matched different sodas. (Click HERE to read Hader’s entire “recipe.”)

Chipotle Celebrity Packaging
Inset:David Buchan/Getty

And Apatow’s message, “Two Minutes of Rambling Wisdom,” has more of an advice-column vibe. The director first talks about his acceptance of the fact that not everyone will like his work: “I think it is okay to accept the fact that most people won’t get you.”

He also gives the reader a window into his own moral philosophy. “Every day I live by only one rule, be a good guy. I am proud of the fact that for the most part I have tried to make the world a better place in small and large ways. I am even more proud of the fact that for the most part I have not ruined the world,” Apatow writes. (Click HERE to read all of Apatow’s “wisdom”.)

As with their recent Hulu web series, Chipotle is barely mentioned by name with the exception of one quick reference in Apatow’s piece.

Under the broad theme of making “people more curious about where their food comes from and how it is prepared” Chipotle communications director Chris Arnold says the company “wanted to produce content that would entertain, make people curious and give them something thoughtful to read.”

The new cups and bags are arriving in restaurants now.

—Lexi Dwyer

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The Latest Craze in Disco Styles Is See-Through Jeans—but Beware of Foggy Bottoms
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The Latest Craze in Disco Styles Is See-Through Jeans—but Beware of Foggy Bottoms

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On a clear day, you can see forever—or at least that’s the wicked thought behind L.A. designer Agi Berliner’s transparent idea: see-through jeans. Exhibitionists notwithstanding, most folks wear them over bathing suits or as attention-getting evening wear with halters, garter belts and body stockings. Created for the disco crowd, the $34 jeans are selling like, well, hot pants. In just six weeks, 25,000 pairs have already been sold in such major department store chains as Macy’s, Bonwit’s and Saks.

“What’s limiting American designers is that we’re afraid to do something different,” says Berliner, 32, a Hungarian émigré who fled with her family to the U.S. in 1956. Agi thought up the gimmick in London while marveling at the way plastics were being employed by designers of punk fashion. In her L.A. office, where she designs for La Parisienne junior sportswear, Agi spent five days on the phone and six weeks testing to come up with the right plastic.

Agi herself tried out the French-cut jeans with the zipper in front, and quickly found several problems: Some plastics tore away from stitching, others wouldn’t bend and all fogged with perspiration. The ideal material proved to be a vinyl supplied by a bookbinder. The steam was eliminated with a series of vents behind the knees and in the crotch. “They’re no hotter than polyester pants,” claims Agi, “and if you wear them with tights, they won’t stick to your legs.”

Whatever the discomfort and despite the problem of Saturday night feverishness, discomaniacs report one major advantage of the plastic pants: no laundry bills. To keep Berliner’s see-through jeans clear, all the wearer needs is a little Windex.

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Chipotle is full of GMO’s. You couldn’t pay me enough to eat there.

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However you do not ought to stick with tradition once selecting a sculpture for your own garden. You should be able to make your own health potions, PP potions, and Pokeballs. However, it should be noted that unlike the Executioner, the Poseidon’s anti-air capability is extremely weak.

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