Restaurant Promises to Deliver Your Food via Roller Coaster, and We Have So Many Questions

01/05/2016 at 04:23 PM ET

Roller Coaster
Alton Towers

You’ve heard of farm-to-table, but what about… roller coaster-to-table??!!?? (Insert comically exaggerated spit-take and record scratch noise.)

In May 2016, the U.K.’s Alton Towers Resort will be introducing the prosaically named Rollercoaster Restaurant, which is not — as you may have guessed — a restaurant where patrons eat on a roller coaster, or a restaurant where the kitchen staff is forced to cook on a roller coaster, but rather a restaurant where your food is delivered via roller coaster. (Insert comically exaggerated spit-take and record scratch noise.)

I’ll let them explain: “The new Rollercoaster Restaurant is set below a vast rollercoaster track where diners can watch as their order tackles two gravity defying loop-the-loops before dropping 8 metres down the tornado spiral to their table.” (We’re ignoring the fact that they’re in violation of the AP style guide, which mandates “roller coaster” be two words.)

“Each diner will enjoy a full 360˚ dining experience at one of the 13 tables,” the site’s blurb continues. Thrilling. Truly thrilling. Watch the video — oddly soundtracked to “In the Hall of the Mountain King,” traditionally used to signal ominous and/or foreboding events in film — and take on the rapturous expression of wonder assumed by the Photoshopped family on the restaurant’s landing page.

Related: Kate Hudson and Nick Jonas Share a Magical Day in Disney World

The menu, which is predictably — but also bafflingly — laden with roller coaster puns (“Thrills Grills and Spills”) and phrases/objects one doesn’t typically associate with roller coasters. (“Jump Through Hoops” and “The Big Dipper” both appear in section-header font, with no food items below them.)

Also, we’d like to take some time to unpack the presence of the phrase, “Time to turn the tables,” which is also set adrift on the menu, unmoored from any food items. That phrase seems to imply, as we originally assumed, that the diners themselves would be in motion while eating, which — as we have already exhaustively explained — is not the premise of Alton Towers’ Rollercoaster Restaurant.

Related: Talk About a Heart-Racing Moment! Man Proposes to Girlfriend on Roller Coaster

Lastly, any number of food items one typically doesn’t want served en mouvement — soups, nachos, something called a “potted British ham hock” (which sounds medical) — are present. I’m giving Alton Towers the benefit of the doubt and assuming they’ve worked out some kind of system for these, but given the prominent placement of “accident” and “crash” in Google’s auto-complete results when you type “Alton Towers,” one does wonder.

See you there in May!

— Alex Heigl, @alex_heigl

FILED UNDER: Food , Food News , Restaurants , Travel

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The Latest Craze in Disco Styles Is See-Through Jeans—but Beware of Foggy Bottoms
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The Latest Craze in Disco Styles Is See-Through Jeans—but Beware of Foggy Bottoms

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On a clear day, you can see forever—or at least that’s the wicked thought behind L.A. designer Agi Berliner’s transparent idea: see-through jeans. Exhibitionists notwithstanding, most folks wear them over bathing suits or as attention-getting evening wear with halters, garter belts and body stockings. Created for the disco crowd, the $34 jeans are selling like, well, hot pants. In just six weeks, 25,000 pairs have already been sold in such major department store chains as Macy’s, Bonwit’s and Saks.

“What’s limiting American designers is that we’re afraid to do something different,” says Berliner, 32, a Hungarian émigré who fled with her family to the U.S. in 1956. Agi thought up the gimmick in London while marveling at the way plastics were being employed by designers of punk fashion. In her L.A. office, where she designs for La Parisienne junior sportswear, Agi spent five days on the phone and six weeks testing to come up with the right plastic.

Agi herself tried out the French-cut jeans with the zipper in front, and quickly found several problems: Some plastics tore away from stitching, others wouldn’t bend and all fogged with perspiration. The ideal material proved to be a vinyl supplied by a bookbinder. The steam was eliminated with a series of vents behind the knees and in the crotch. “They’re no hotter than polyester pants,” claims Agi, “and if you wear them with tights, they won’t stick to your legs.”

Whatever the discomfort and despite the problem of Saturday night feverishness, discomaniacs report one major advantage of the plastic pants: no laundry bills. To keep Berliner’s see-through jeans clear, all the wearer needs is a little Windex.

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Anonymous on

There is already a restaurant like this in a theme park in Germany. It’s still a fun idea for restaurants but definitely not the first one.

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