Anthony Bourdain’s Biggest Fears Include Clowns and All of the Real Housewives
Eating exotic foods in far off countries and going head-to-head with Guy Fieri is no sweat for Anthony Bourdain—but clowns? He’s not having it.
For his latest entry on the List App, the Parts Unknown host put together a collection of things “I genuinely find terrifying” in a list he titled “Scary S—!!!” At the top of his list sits the red-nosed entertainers.
“I’m sure I’m not alone here,” he writes on the app founded by actor and author B.J. Novak. “Were clowns ever funny? No. Of course not. They were always sinister figures, disguising their homicidal intentions under thick make-up, all the while their crawl spaces and chest freezers were brimming with Cub Scout parts.”
Bourdain also addresses his fear of mimes, karaoke, rats and Switzerland. The chef is so afraid of the neutral country that it’s one of the few places he hasn’t visited.
“I live with a persistent dread of alpine vistas, chalet architecture, Tyrolean hats, even cheese with holes in it,” he says.
Pressure cookers, Nashville hot chicken (the extra hot version) and “the Real Housewives of Anywhere” are also big no-nos for Bourdain.
“Their glassy gazes, surgical addictions and single minded hunger for attention are a clear and present danger to anyone in their trajectories,” he said of the Bravo reality stars.
—Ana Calderone, @anacalderone